0

Your cells are listening

How to Heal Yourself by Talking to your Body

Was super maxed out the last week.

Then I began to listen to the state, to my body.

And I remember reading lines that went:”the body is self healing ”

And I began talking to myself and I did feel a difference.

I thought that if I were largely responsible for wrecking me, then equally I must be capable of finding a way out of this.

This story answered me.

0

好累啊!

为什么?

很多时候,我都是把累忍下去,用意志再让自己前进一步。但有一两回,静下来,去听它,听到这样的信息——是你自己造成的。是你自己把自己带到这地方的。

有一种在玩火的感觉。

而且是个恶性的循环。很累的时候,不能自己的时候,很熟悉的声音就回来找碴——你一定是哪里不舒服了?那个地方不对劲了。你病了。

这些负面的声音不断重复。让我累上加累。

这30多年来,我都在这么灌输自己,告诉自己这样的事。怎么会不累呢?

偶尔静下来听的时候,听到与众不同的信息。包括,这累的出现,无非是让我好好正视它,好好去了解它的起因。

包括我为什么那么灌输自己那些讯息?

然后我才明白,这些讯息都是我小时候,吸收到身边大人的想法,心声、担忧。包括小时候爸爸动脊椎手术,外婆病倒……原来这些都给我很大的影响。直接和间接的影响。

不如妈妈因为这两件事承受的压力和担忧,没有言语出来,当时还小的我,应该也吸收了妈妈心里的声音。

因为了解这点,我更小心谨慎再孩子面前的想法。恍然原来自己这么一直以来,给孩子灌输的就是我这样的心声。

那些都不是我的!

都不是我的!

都不是我的!

搞清楚了陈彬雁!你一点都不需要这些。

我听到自己说,既然是我可以把自己带到这边,我也可以把自己带向健康。平安。喜乐!我可以。

累也是因为压力大。

在工作岗位上这么多年,从来没有像是现在这样。我觉得是有压力的。不是前面的路会不会成功,而是这几个月这节骨眼上,凑了许多的巧合。

我只能说,这样的机会,就是为了让我跨越。

 

0

Francis Mallmann

Super inspired by Argentine chef Francis Mallmann, arguably the biggest food star in the Latin world.

Watched him on Netflix and twice over, Francis Mallmann is an expert at cooking with fire: over it, under it, in it and around it.

https://www.nowness.com/story/francis-mallmann-carne-knowledge

He says that to cook with fire, one must have a feminine side, to understand the fragility of the meats.

But above this mastery over fire, its his mastery over his life that is so awe inspiring.

He is unbounded by constraints of any sort. He is boundless, but because he has family, he is torn between the two. There is just one time in the documentary that he cannot himself, talking about his family, and perhaps is regretful or sorry, that he has chosen himself over his family.

But that’s mastery too.

Love all the quotes he gave in the documentary, so wise, so deep, so alluring.

 

 

In order to grow, you have to be there, at the edge of uncertainty.

All those things made me dream

That there was a free world somewhere

So my big draw in life since very young was freedom

The freedom of believing only in myself

And not letting myself being led by anybody

I wanted to be my own

I wanted to do whatever I wanted.

I m always cooking in the wild

My message is, Get out of chair , sofa , office . go out

When u cook with fire it’s like making love

It could be huge

You have to respect what you cook

There needs to b a festive feeling about the hard work we r doing

I was very stubborn about my freedom

There’s nothing more sad than an overcooked fish

They r v inspiring romantic

They made me breathe they make me tremble

They make me live

I seldom invite people to lunch or dinner

They are really chosen

I cant spend Time with people that I don’t enjoy

I can’t do it anymore  as theater

I make choices

And that’s the beautiful thing about growing up

Learning to say no

In a nice way but you say no

I said the truth

Growing up has a bit to do with that

To be able to tell the truth

To show who you are

Even if it hurts

every person that works with you

You have to let him go at the best moment

When he and you are at the happiest moment

Then he and you think you are doing your best

They have to go

Because from  there on, there is only one way which is down

You are young you have a master you want to emulate him

But

At some point in life you have to turn around

And say I have to find my own way my language

Big prizes in life, they make you happy and sad

Because they make you question yourself

I said that was it

You have your little car

You have a place to sleep

And the dreams are dead

You don’t grow on a secure path

All of us should conquer something in life

It Needs a lot of work

It needs a lot of risk

0

3years 3months

皓皓今天39个月了。

IMG_9392

好快!我的宝贝,好爱你!

皓皓用水笔在窗上画画,daddy说,那是因为皓皓坏蛋,原本画在plasma car上面。后来不好玩就画窗口。

原来坏蛋也是灵动的脑经所致

IMG_7386

午后,给皓皓棒棒糖。便看到他春天那样的笑

IMG_7388IMG_7392

 

学校庆祝Easter,皓皓拿了蛋回来,吃。

IMG_7405

给皓皓尝试用电脑。

一一拼出huaihao的英文字母,让他一一在拼盘上找出字母来

IMG_7206.jpg

让皓皓学习收拾

IMG_7695

就是他眼神里的光,让我着迷

IMG_7878

这一天,去吃晚餐。皓皓说要拍照

IMG_7886 IMG_7888 IMG_7891

皓皓说,traffic jam

IMG_7918

这个宝贝什么话都会讲。:)

这一天,就这么跟我玩

IMG_8272

去yamaha,姐姐上课时,我们在外头等。等待时,让皓皓写字画画。然后折纸飞机和小船

IMG_8582 IMG_8583

公公的车子撞坏了,给了mommy和皓皓一起上学、下课的时间独处。

做了一点不一样的,比如下课后带皓皓去great world city午餐。

 

IMG_9090 IMG_9095 IMG_9100

午后,朋友送了糕点了,两个小瓜乐坏了,直嚷着要巧克力的。

IMG_9116

亲爱的宝贝,祝你健康,平安,快乐!

0

Beauty 

More and more in life, I have come to realise that beauty, more often than not, comes from a state of wreck.

Beauty, of wreckage.

The Tragedy That Shaped Yohji Yamamoto