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风继续吹

Powerful Rendition。

“你已在我心不必再问记著谁”

我劝你早点归去
你说你不想归去
只叫我抱著你
悠悠海风轻轻吹冷却了野火堆
我看见伤心的你
你说我怎舍得去
哭态也绝美
如何止哭只得轻吻你发边让
风继续吹不忍远离
心里极渴望希望留下伴著你
风继续吹不忍远离
心里亦有泪不愿流泪望著你
过去多少快乐记忆
何妨与你一起去追
要将忧郁苦痛洗去
柔情蜜意我愿己取
要强忍离情泪
未许它向下垂
愁如锁眉头聚
别离泪始终要下垂
我已令你快乐
你也令我痴痴醉
你已在我心不必再问记著谁
留住眼内每滴泪
为何仍断续留默默垂
风继续吹不忍远离
心里极渴望希望留下伴著你
风继续吹不忍远离
心里亦有泪不愿流泪望著你
过去多少快乐记忆
何妨与你一起去追
要将忧郁苦痛洗去
柔情蜜意我愿己取
要强忍离情泪
未许它向下垂
愁如锁眉头聚
别离泪始终要下垂
我已令你快乐
你也令我痴痴醉
你已在我心不必再问记著谁
留住眼内每滴泪
为何仍断续留默默垂
为何仍断续留默默垂
为何仍断续留默默垂

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Rabindranath Tagore

“The traveler has to knock at every alien door to come to his own, and he has to wonder through all the outer worlds to reach the innermost shrine at the end.”

This is such a beautiful quote. By Bengali poet and novelist, Rabindranath Tagore (7 May 1861 – 7 August 1941).

Also a musician, painter and playwright, he reshaped Bengali literature and music.  He was the first non-European to be awarded the Nobel Prize for Literature (1913).

Some other beautiful words written by home are below.

“I travelled the old road every day, I took my fruits to the market,

my cattle to the meadows, I ferried my boat across the stream and

all the ways were well known to me.

One morning my basket was heavy with wares. Men were busy in

the fields, the pastures crowded with cattle; the breast of earth

heaved with the mirth of ripening rice.

Suddenly there was a tremor in the air, and the sky seemed to

kiss me on my forehead. My mind started up like the morning out of

mist.

I forgot to follow the track. I stepped a few paces from the

path, and my familiar world appeared strange to me, like a flower

I had only known in bud.

My everyday wisdom was ashamed. I went astray in the fairyland

of things. It was the best luck of my life that I lost my path that

morning, and found my eternal childhood.”

Clouds come floating into my life, no longer to carry rain or usher storm, but to add color to my sunset sky.”

“If you cry because the sun has gone out of your life, your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars.”

“You can’t cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water.”

“Love’s gift cannot be given, it waits to be accepted.”

“I slept and dreamt that life was joy. I awoke and saw that life was service. I acted and behold, service was joy.”

“The butterfly counts not months but moments, and has time enough.”

“It is very simple to be happy, but it is very difficult to be simple.”

“Faith is the bird that feels the light and sings when the dawn is still dark.”

“I seem to have loved you in numberless forms, numberless times, in life after life, in age after age forever.”

“Reach high, for stars lie hidden in you. Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal.”

“Don’t limit a child to your own learning, for she was born in another time.”

“I seem to have loved you in numberless forms, numberless times, in life after life, in age after age forever.”

Apparently he’s the writer of this poem, whom i have heard of many times in chinese

The furthest distance in the world

Is not between life and death

But when I stand in front of you

Yet you don’t know that I love you

The furthest distance in the world

Is not when I stand in front of you

Yet you can’t see my love

But when undoubtedly knowing the love from both

Yet cannot be together

 

The furthest distance in the world

Is not being apart while being in love

But when plainly cannot resist the yearning

Yet pretending you have never been in my heart

 

The furthest distance in the world

Is not but using one’s indifferent heart

To dig an uncrossible river

For the one who loves you

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Fail Better

The Fine Art of Failing
BY PEMA CHÖDRÖN| OCTOBER 5, 2015
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Pema Chodron, Fail, Liza Matthews, Buddhadharma, Lion’s Roar, Buddhism

Photo by Liza Matthews.

In her commencement speech at Naropa University, Pema Chödrön explains that if there’s one thing we all need to practice, it’s how to fail well.
When Naropa asked me for the topic of my talk, I decided not to give it to them because I thought if I did, they wouldn’t let me do it! My talk is inspired by a quote from Samuel Beckett that goes like this: “Fail. Fail again. Fail better.” I thought if there is one skill that is not stressed very much but is really needed, it is knowing how to fail well. The fine art of failing.
There is a lot of emphasis on succeeding. And whether we buy the hype or not, we all want to succeed, especially if you consider success as “it works out the way I want it to.” You know it feels good in the gut and in the heart because it worked out. So failing, by that definition, is that it didn’t work out the way you wanted it to.
And failing is what we don’t usually get a lot of preparation for.
I think if there is one thing that prepares you for having some idea of how to work with the rawness of things not working out the way you want them to, it would be contemplative education. You have gotten a lot of instruction and encouragement and support for feeling how things impact you—not just going down the tubes with it but actually taking responsibility for what is happening to you and having some tools about how to work with painful feelings, raw feelings.
So fail, fail again, fail better. It’s how to get good at holding the rawness of vulnerability in your heart.
 
From Fail, Fail Again, Fail Better, Sounds True, September 2015

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3years 2 months

宝贝理发了,超可爱!

好爱你:)

昨天送皓皓上学,然后躲在一扇门后,偷看皓皓。没有想到原来皓皓知道我藏在那头,转头回来看到我,向我挥挥手,然后又把头转向老师。

那一刻,我只感觉整个人软掉了。

有一股感动的浪潮,那是小孩子最真的心点燃的,很真很深。

好像在说:“妈妈,我在这里可以了,你可以去做工”

然后,我觉得好羞耻,羞耻于我一个要上班去工作的决定,羞耻于我没有放下自己,把皓皓沁芝放在第一位的决定。

我把自己放在第一位的决定。

觉得自己好傻。

最值得我努力的投入的给予我的全部的,就在这里了。我为什么还要往外去看?去投放时间?

是那一个挥手,让我想放掉一切。只是回家,做皓皓沁芝的妈妈。

这小宝贝!

皓皓说:traffic jam :)

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最近皓皓坏蛋,daddy用心教,比如抢姐姐的东西,爸爸总是拉皓皓到门外,两三次之后皓皓比较能学乖。

皓皓叫mommy binyan,感觉很奇特。会觉得全身的鸡皮疙瘩跑出来。但又爱听。

我们是延续,是沁芝皓皓让我知道的

皓皓喜欢画圆圈。

想起以前怀孕时,自己也经常画圈圈。现在轮到他画。这不就是一种延续吗?

 

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还有,皓皓笑的时候,喜欢抿嘴笑。

我说为什么?他说mommy这样笑。

孩子就是一面镜子。告诉我们,我们是怎么样在生活,在做一个怎样的人。

我们经常不晓得,我们是父母祖先的延续。

但我们是。

看到皓皓画,我清楚知道。

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小瓜戴眼镜,又理发,好可爱!

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带小坏蛋下楼带姐姐。

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这一天是沁芝的农历生日,我们和姨姨婆婆Davina姐姐去吃晚餐

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接着给姐姐买蛋糕

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给姐姐唱生日歌

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皓皓很利害。这个月病了相当长的一段时间。带皓皓去看中医,和中医聊起,沁芝的门牙掉了许久还没长出来。中医建议喝牛奶多吃钙质。

结果皓皓隔天翻报纸,看到牛奶的广告,就说:“沁芝要喝牛奶。”

问他是谁说的?

他说:“刘医师”

皓皓咳嗽。mommy说要用手遮住嘴巴。结果他睡觉时咳嗽也用手遮嘴巴

早上。他喝柠檬蜜糖,自己要吸管。也拿了一根给姐姐。

然后对沁芝说:说谢谢。说大声一点!

小大人似的。

但他对沁芝其实是很爱护的。会主动拿吸管。会要沁芝陪他玩。

最让人感动的是,早上带沁芝去做校车的时候,会说:“you have a beautiful wonderful day,don’t peel”

因为沁芝最近爱拔手指的皮。mommy要皓皓帮忙提醒沁芝,不要peel,结果他这么说了。

到了学校,皓皓养成了公公的车子驶入校园之后,mommy才说“you have a beautiful wonderful day“

然后下车,hug 公公。

而且他才被提点一次,就知道了裴老师的名字。会主动跟老师说早安。

跟学校的老师谈起皓皓爱欺负沁芝,我发现这一两周以来,皓皓好很多,没有对沁芝抓、捏的。

周末,dandelyn带大家去吃,沁芝皓皓也去

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这一天,我们到植物园去picnic,荡荡秋千,

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玩捉迷藏

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喂喂鱼

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度过愉快的星期天

隔天姐姐去yamaha之后,一如往常,去鼎泰丰吃晚餐。

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22日当天,我们请公公去吃大餐。皓皓很厉害吃,花椒、炸虾、虾壳等等。好逗!

 

希望宝贝天天吃好,心情好,身体好。

 

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感谢花落

Observing it fall from grace.

We are all so accustomed to welcoming a blossom.

Yet always not used to using the same attitude when observing a fall.

This beauty taught me so many.

I remember how happy i was receiving it. The joy was immense, pure and true.

Then i remembered how i watered it and tried to nurture it. How i got the little one to water it. And talk to the plant while offering water.

And then i just felt a rush of gratitude.

The plant taught me so much in its presence. I remember the process it brought me through, and the wonderful feelings it gave me.

It taught me first about accepting with open arms, then learning to accept the process and the inevitable fall from grace.

And now, i feel thankful, i have this chance to observe it fall. There is a time for everything. And the time is now.

one by one.

hao is only 3 years old, but he said he felt “sad” when the orchid petals fell.

why he is only 3! but could resonate so much with nature, its simply wonderful !

thank you for the lessons, the process , the inspirations.

IMG_7033.jpg

我们只记得欢庆花开

却忘了感谢花落。

看到花落,有一种失望和难过的心情。

但想到接收它来临的时刻,它带来的快乐。我学习去浇水,滋养它的那一段。以及观察它跌落的种种,让我懂得感谢花落。

感谢曾经拥有的曾经。

和皓皓谈起,他说,看到花哭了,会sad。我很讶异,孩子怎么也会有这样的心?但会有的。

人之常情。

然后周末上班,也看到黄叶满地。

都是跌落、花落的景物。忍不住要驻足想想,大自然要对我说的是什么?

是放下!

不要的统统放下。以前如何如何,都不重要了!

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7years 1month

沁芝7岁一个月了。已经是小美女一个。

好标致!

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daddy提醒,沁芝三四岁的时候,很喜欢亲mommy。但现在总是皓皓在亲。要学习顾及沁芝的感受。

沁芝长大了。

看到沁芝很多地方和我很像。胆小。没有自信。但沁芝啊,你一定要相信。你有无限的潜能。

不要担心不要害怕。

你绝对可以。

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这一天,去舅公家拜年。然后去阿祖家,之前有点时间,我们和阿妹姨姨、庚延舅舅和karyn姐姐午餐。玩成一团,沁芝很乐

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这一天正月二十五。沁芝的农历生日。我们带姨姨婆婆、davina姐姐去晚餐。之后去给沁芝买蛋糕。然后回家给沁芝唱生日歌

 

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周末,dandelyn带大家去吃,沁芝皓皓也去

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带沁芝去采访香港冰棒品牌,她有口福。之后去吃寿司晚餐

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很快学校加起来了,沁芝去了pasir ris住了一个星期。然后假期过去。

宝贝,mommy没有在假期的时候给你任何的额外功课,不像是其他家长那样。这一点对mmmy来说,也是一个struggle。要不要你多做一点呢?

但能要你做多少呢》多少都不足够。

最后,只是想让你过愉快的假期。

让你记得假期里你在阿姨家趴趴走,阿姨带你出门吃吃喝喝,和阿姨一家互动的时光。简单快乐的时光。因为mommy相信,这些都将成为你宝贵的回忆。

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老狼

我是歌手第四季的发现–老狼。

让你知道,执着和热忱为什么可以保鲜。真的可以保鲜。

他的声音还有稚嫩干净的部分。

还有这首歌,歌词好好。

歌手:朴树 

我梦到一个孩子

我梦到那个孩子在路边的花园哭泣

昨天飞走了心爱的气球”

你可曾找到

请告诉我”那只气球飞到遥远的遥远的那座山后

老爷爷把它系在屋顶上

等着爸爸他带你去寻找

有一天爸爸走累了就丢失在深深的陌生山谷像

那只气球再也找不到

这是个 旅途 一个叫做命运的茫茫 旅途 

我们偶然相遇然后离去在这条永远不归的路

我们路过高山我们路过湖泊我们路过森林路过沙漠路过人们的城堡和花园

路过幸福我们路过痛苦路过一个女人的温暖和眼泪路过生命中漫无止境的寒冷和孤独 

还有这一首《同桌的你》