Dear Little Daughter:
I have waited for you to get well settled before writing. By this time I hope some of the strangeness has worn off and that my little girl is working hard and regularly.
Of course, everything is new and unusual. You miss the newness and smartness of America. Gradually, however, you are going to sense the beauty of the old world: its calm and eternity and you will grow to love it.
Above all remember, dear, that you have a great opportunity. You are in one of the world’s best schools, in one of the world’s greatest modern empires. Millions of boys and girls all over this world would give almost anything they possess to be where you are. You are there by no desert or merit of yours, but only by lucky chance.
Deserve it, then. Study, do your work. Be honest, frank and fearless and get some grasp of the real values of life. You will meet, of course, curious little annoyances. People will wonder at your dear brown and the sweet crinkley hair. But that simply is of no importance and will soon be forgotten. Remember that most folk laugh at anything unusual, whether it is beautiful, fine or not. You, however, must not laugh at yourself. You must know that brown is as pretty as white or prettier and crinkley hair as straight even though it is harder to comb. The main thing is the YOU beneath the clothes and skin — the ability to do, the will to conquer, the determination to understand and know this great, wonderful, curious world. Don’t shrink from new experiences and custom. Take the cold bath bravely. Enter into the spirit of your big bed-room. Enjoy what is and not pine for what is not. Read some good, heavy, serious books just for discipline: Take yourself in hand and master yourself. Make yourself do unpleasant things, so as to gain the upper hand of your soul.
Above all remember: your father loves you and believes in you and expects you to be a wonderful woman.
I shall write each week and expect a weekly letter from you.
From Sociologist and civil rights pioneer W.E.B. Du Bois to his daughter Yolande.
I have never really understood what it was like to learn in happiness. But a beautiful pot of orchid sent to me helped me break new ground.
The admin assistant who brought the pot to me remarked, “i havent seen you so happy in a while!”
and it made me realise how happy i was.
i said “thank you” to her, to which she added.
“welcome. i m happy to see you happy.”
And i thought, how wonderful!!!
feelings are contagious. they are apparent, or shall i say, energy.
how you feel, what you radiate goes out, and this little episode, made me aware of how i should keep myself so that i radiate only goodness and good energy n happy things out.
because it makes a difference, even if i m little.
it makes a difference.
i love it that this little joy is shared and its very deep and holds precious good energy . i think its so precious.
and what is even more wonderful, is that in those few moments of happiness, i found myself in a very pure empty space, i was fully aware. and it was blank space that was very wide and quiet and peaceful.
i have always heard about emptiness. but that time, i experienced it.
and i m reminded of what my travel companion said when we were travelling in india, he shared how he felt when at Lakhdah, when it seemed boundless, i remember his words, and that was that, there is no need for words.
you feel empty.
And i m convinced only nature can bring forth these gifts.
i m reminded of that day when i did therapy and teacher got me to draw an angel card, that shows abundance.
the message was that, to receive abundance, you have to clean out the old and things that do not work.
this came close.
how wonderful when we co create with the universe.
然后感谢。我相信眼前这一天将不一样。将美好。我set the intention。
车子快到学校时，皓皓会说：mommy，你要跟我讲，have a beautiful wonderful day,我说了之后，轮到皓皓这么对我说，接着对着公公说。
有一次跟daddy玩，daddy伸手要捉弄皓皓，皓皓吐槽：qiu jin jian（手这么多！）笑到我……！玩具车子从桌子跌下，我说puat doh（跌倒），他说是palingdao（更标准的福建话，也是跌倒的意思）
最近皓皓喜欢被我抱着入睡，就像小时候一样，抱着他唱儿歌，他说，他喜欢rock a bye baby
H for huaihao，他说。而且非常端正！
Attending Rinpoche’s talk at Tara’s home made me once again feel blessed and privileged.
I saw the stupa and standing in front of it brought waves of emotions in my heart centre
And I teared
I could feel the energy coming out from the Buddha in the stupa and it was wonderful through n through，
And it was later that i realise, its this that i m feeling.
The #divinity in me #honors the divinity in you. So There was a sense of healing.
It wasn’t anything new I learnt at the talk but the points brought up surely reinforced things that were recently made known to me n made me think.
Words i heard today echoed what I learnt in my sessions with mr ng.
And I thought about the angel card I drew with the word “abundance”
It’s about cleaning out things that no longer work in life to make space for the now n the new.
It’s amazing how the universe echoes back reminders.
The topic for the afternoon was dealing with difficult people.
- And Rinpoche started talking about dealing with difficult people because of others’ difficult emotions.
- It’s difficult when emotions run high
- It’s difficult when emotions run up against ours, or simply me, my, I.
- He encouraged us to look deeply enough into our emotions, to find out what they are, why they r, how they r surfaced etc so as to better take care of them
- In other words, look at yourself. What the other person is doing is inviting you to look at your own emotions, look within. There is a problem because the problem is not in another person but in yourself
- Ability to cope with problems others create is within you
- A lot of times problems arise because you do not love yourself enough
- And when you block yourself
- Because in fact, you are strong enough to deal with your own emotions
- The concept of forgiveness might b important to revisit. You need more strength n courage to forgive. It is easier to not forgive than to forgive
- Once u forgive, your mind changes
- Regard it as a movie, don’t cling
- Don’t adopt a self cherishing view
- At the end of life, we get a glimpse of what is going to happen in the next life, and at that point, a lot of things we give great emphasis on in this life, they don’t matter.
- We blame others for the problems we have within ourselves
- Approach things with an open mind, a wider perspective
- Problems we meet r meant as an opportunity for us to surpass ourselves, the me, my I
- Search for the real place where the problems come from
- If you think hard, someone makes that action out of desperation and lack of choice
- The concept of spirituality is to take care of all the problems and working within
- It’s about freeing yourself. Not the other person
- Others don’t matter
- Forgiving others is the first step to forgiving n realizing yourself
- Love is not attachment
- Things that matter change thru out life. Why problems appear is because those problems matter to u. You apply mental energy and things come out to put into perspective for u
- Let go
- Life is a good opportunity to train and change your mind to become peaceful
- Life is what you make out of it. The stronger your mind, the better
At the end of it, Rinpoche presented us with a little Mala and mine was blue.
Presented it on the stupa for blessings before I made my way out.
About Charok Lama
Ven. Charok Lama Rinpoche
Charak Lama, Nawang Ridzin Gyatso Rinpoche, is the incarnation of Kusho Mangden, a highly respected Nyingmapa master from Solo Kumbu, Nepal. Kusho Mangden passed away in Jan 1992 and the incarnation was born 9 months later into a very poor family an hour’s walk from his previous life home.
At the age of two, taken in by the sister of Lama Zopa Rinpoche, Anila Nawang Samden, Charak Lama moved to the nearby Lawudo Gompa, the home of Lama Zopa Rinpoche’s previous life. At the age of four he moved to Kopan Monastery in Kathmandu, Nepal to begin his life as a monk in the Gelug tradition. At the age of 10 he moved to Sera Je Monastery in South India and began his philosophy studies in earnest. Completing his first level of studies in the top 5 percentile of his class, Charak Lama was chosen in 2012 to participate in the prestigious Rig.chung ceremony. For four years running he has also been amongst a small group of top students selected from each class to attend the annual Jangwa or “winter debate” session of Ganden, Drepung and Sera Monastery monks.
Charak Lama possesses the rare and outstanding ability to extract the essence of his philosophical studies and apply it to the Western traditions of science and psychology. An avid reader and seeker of knowledge it is hard to find a topic he has not studied, on his own, alongside his rigorous monastic routine. Rinpoche converses in perfect Tibetan, Nepali, Sherpa and English and has every intention of mastering Chinese, German French and Spanish as well.
A very good animation on the subject.
This is an entirely hand drawn short video by Marsha Onderstijn, an animator from the Netherlands. This video follows a fun representation of death. Death appears as a cute specter wearing a skull as a mask. Death is going through a forest when it see’s a dear. There is a prolonged sense of longing as Death projects a sense of loneliness. Everything Death touches, dies.
A really well done video, done entirely by hand which is a rarity these days. Most animated videos are products of massive production lines and computer projections This video has been received warmly at various animation festivals. It was even featured on the EYE film DVD of Selected Dutch Shorts.
The idea that death is in love with life, and that is why Death takes living beings, isn’t a new idea. That doesn’t stop it from being a fun concept! This version of Death is softer than most, metaphorically relating a more ‘human’ side of Death. It would make sense that Death is a sad spirit, with a unquenchable desire for contact and communication. We fear and hate the idea of death, if everyone hated you it would color your character strangely as well.
很不容易，但mommy会坚持下去，因为要给沁芝皓皓一个很好的榜样。用grit 和sheer determination，继续加油前进。
“On a biological level, it is amazing to consider that the egg which became you was literally carried by your grandmother; since your mother developed her eggs while she was a fetus inside her mother’s womb.
Coping mechanisms, stress patterns, family system patterns, as well as social and economic environments through those generations have left imprints on us that we are still sorting through.
The beautiful thing about approaching healing from this perspective is that our own personal healing also brings resolution to our greater network of relations moving forward and backward in time.”
Such an amazingly beautiful piece.